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Why UKIP is backing 50:50 shared parenting for separated dads

November 3, 2014 by Inside MAN 9 Comments

UKIP gave its backing to 50-50 shared parenting for parents who separate, at its party conference in September, a move that has proved popular with many fathers’ rights campaigners. We asked the party’s Deputy Chair, Suzanne Evans, to share her personal reasons for supporting fathers’ rights.

—This is article #32 in our series of #100Voices4Men and boys

Why is UKIP putting a commitment to 50-50 shared parenting in its Manifesto for the 2015 General Election? Because, quite simply, it is the right thing to do.

It is also long overdue. Do we live in a society where – in principle at least – there is gender equality, or not? Do we live in a society where fathers are increasingly being encouraged to take a more active role in children’s lives, by taking paternity leave and so on, or not? Of course we do, so why the status quo on this key issue should currently be so inadequate is beyond me.

I first encountered the problem of fathers being excluded from their children’s lives over ten years ago when I was dating a lovely man who had a daughter he had not seen since her mother had started a new relationship. He would show up to collect his daughter as per their agreement, but no one would be at home.

Mum’s new partner was less than friendly; he went to quite extraordinary and frightening lengths to put pressure on him not to see his little girl for no other reason than he and mum would find it inconvenient.

My father died when I was six

Even when he was diagnosed with cancer, his ex-wife still refused to let him see his daughter. The court process was utterly useless, not to put to fine a point on it, and he died having not seen his own child for some three years. Attending his funeral was bad enough; under these circumstances it was utterly heartbreaking.

My own father died when I was six. While my mother was brilliant – everything a good mum should be – it was tough growing up without a dad and in a family where life had suddenly been turned upside down.

While I’d be the last person to suggest warring couples should stay together ‘for the sake of the children,’ as I think that too can do horrendous psychological damage to young minds, it seems to me common sense that in most cases children will benefit from having two parents in their lives.

http://youtu.be/aNH5wH_J_F0

Everyone benefits when dad’s involved 

Parenting is a tough job at the best of times, even when two people share responsibilities. As a single mum myself, I know it can sometimes be overwhelming doing it on your own.

Frankly, not only do children benefit from having two responsible, loving parents, the parents’ will benefit from continuing to support each other through shared parenting after divorce or separation too.

Of course there will always be fathers and mothers who for very good child protection reasons should not have unfettered access to their children, and UKIP’s position should not be seen as watering this down at all.

A child’s welfare must always come first and we would certainly not shy away from depriving any parent proven to be abusive or a danger to children of their rights.

Grandparents need better rights too

Our policy is purely to address the imbalance in current parenting arrangements; to make sure good fathers are treated equally by the system; and to back up parents refused access to their children by former partners for no good reason.

A UKIP government will also give grandparents visiting rights. They too have built up often very strong and loving relationships with their grandchildren and to be suddenly cut out of their lives does neither them or the children any good.

We know we can’t stop families breaking up, and we know we can’t force all parents to take their responsibilities seriously after relationships break down, but at the very least we can stop penalising those who want to do their right thing by their children.

 —Picture credit: Flickr/David Precious

To find out more about UKIP’s support of 50:50 shared parenting see Suzanne Evans speech to the party’s Doncaster conference “a safety net not a hammock“.

insideMAN does not support a political party and we are happy to receive articles about men, masculinity and manhood from writers of all political political parties 

The views expressed in these articles are not the views of insideMAN editorial team. Whether you agree with the views expressed in this article or not we invite you to take take part in this important discussion, our only request is that you express yourself in a way that ensures everyone’s voice can be heard.

You can find all of the #100Voices4Men articles that will be published in the run up to International Men’s Day 2014 by clicking on this link—#100Voices4Men—and follow the discussion on twitter by searching for #100Voices4Men.

You can join the #100Voices4Men discussion by commenting below; by following us on Twitter @insideMANmag and Facebook or by emailing insideMANeditor@gmail.com. 

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Filed Under: Men’s Issues Tagged With: #100Voices4Men, 50:50 shared parenting, fathers rights, Suzanne Evans, UKIP

  • scott

    this is a step in the right direction myself as a single father have experienced discrimination my ex partner soon as she was born abused my parental rights and responsibility’s was ignored there seems to be this attitude she is the boss ummm girls lady’s you are not the boss of your child and the father u and the father r a team regardless how u feel about him personnel what gets me is i have been accused of using my daughter as a object why because i want a more balanced involvement i want to care for her and be there for her is that so wrong what angers me is people run around and don’t say a word to these mothers the lack of support and understanding is just amazing i am ashamed and embarrassed and a personnel disgust at the way children and single fathers r treated

  • teresa

    Not all fathers want to see their children

    • Mike

      Society should expect fathers to be involved with their children , just as it does mothers.

    • Ben

      I think the vast majority of them do, unless they have been tricked into paying child support and voiced opposition to having a child of course….

  • Ann Gaunt

    Some children refuse to see their Father even if the mother thinks it only right they should. Due to their experience of his unfair treatment towards the mother,and because the father refuses to make any effort to explain his bad behavior there can be no progress.Also his new partner can sometimes be very unhelpful.

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  • Nigel

    One of the first things that needs to happen is courts taking action to enforce the orders they make . All too frequently the provisions made by the court are treated with contempt by the ” resident” parent . However the non – resident parent finds that whatever the courts may say they actually can’t or won’t take action agaist such contempt of court. Quite by coincidence I happened on one of the occasional papers produced in Northern Ireland social attitudes project. One finding was that in 4 years respondents who believed courts their were biased against fathers rose from just over half to four fifths and there’s was a similar jump in support for shared parenting ( most makes in men but with similar proportions of women) .

  • http://malepsychology.org.uk/ John Barry

    The value of being a responsible father needs to be appreciated more. Earlier this year a report from the Centre for Social Justice said that more 15 year old boys have smartphones than live with their fathers. The report also said that single parent families cost the UK taxpayer almost £50 billion per year in welfare and criminal justice costs. A society that treats fathers as dispensable is a society in crisis.

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