insideMAN

Mother circumcises son despite father’s pleas to save him

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Last year insideMAN published a letter from an Iranian father-to-be from London who wrote to us asking for help in stopping his wife circumcising their son.

We recently contacted him to find out what had happened. His response is posted below. We have kept the father’s identity anonymous to protect the identity of his son.

The support I received through insideMAN was invaluable, you were the only people who seemed to understand what I was going through. Sadly, after taking legal advice, I felt the only way to keep my family together was to go along with my wife’s wishes.

At least I could be there to support my son, rather than taking the risk that she would do it behind my back. So we went to a doctor in Harley Street together and I cried throughout the procedure and he was crying his eyes out too. The moment the operation was over I snatch him from the nurses arms and whispered in his ear that he will never have to go through such trauma ever again.

I couldn’t believe how much blood was in his nappy and I had to take him to a second specialist to find out if he was okay, because the first doctor didn’t tell us what to expect.

I still feel frustrated and heartbroken that I was unable to protect my son and since the operation. I have recently developed alopecia, which I think was caused by the stress of this situation.

I’m sad to say that the sparkle from my relationship with my wife has completely gone and I have been so deeply touched by what happened that I don’t think it can be repaired.

But my son is such a delight. I’m being a really hands-on dad and we’ve bonded really well. He loves being in my company and when I return from work he cries out as soon as he hears my voice.

He is the best thing to ever happen to me. We have bonded so well, it feels like he knows how much I care about him and when he is old enough and will share this article with him so he knows what happened.

Photo: Ran Yaniv Hartstein

You can read the original letter here.

The father’s letter and this update are one of the powerful men’s stories included in our crowdfunded book. Help give these inspiring men a voice by clicking below and backing our project:

 

Mother jailed for refusing to have her son circumcised forced to withdraw her case

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A US mother who was jailed for refusing to allow her son to be circumcised remains behind bars despite withdrawing her case.

Heather Hironimus, 31, went into hiding with her four-year-old son after a bitter legal battle with the boy’s father Dennis Nebus, reported Sky news.

The couple were never married, but share custody of their child and had filed a parenting agreement in court where they both agreed to their son being circumcised.

‘Scared to death’

But Hironimus later changed her mind, with her son reportedly “scared to death” of the procedure.

In March, a Palm Beach County judge signed a warrant for her arrest after she failed to appear in court so the procedure could be carried out.

She was arrested after going into hiding with her son at a domestic violence shelter.

According to reports, Hironimus has now withdrawn her case in the belief there was no hope of it succeeding and to have continued would have jeopardised her custody rights to her son.

Thomas Hunker, attorney for the mother, told her supporters that his mission now is to try to get Heather “out of jail and preserve her custody rights.”

Legal precedent

However in the latest twist in the extraordinary case, she has not been released as she is now charged with interfering with the father’s custody of the boy.

Judges have sided with Mr Nebus, but surgeons have refused to carry out the operation after Hironimus refused to give consent and anti-circumcision protesters targeted them.

The mother’s lawyer said continuing the lawsuit opposing the circumcision would surely result in “an unfavorable order which could potentially hurt the cause and future efforts to establish a child’s right to object to circumcision. I hope you understand and agree that under the circumstances, this was our only available option”.

The decision to back down from the case has triggered sadness and anger from anti-circumcision campaigners who have backed her case and raised funds to support the legal battle.

Georganne Chapin, executive director of Intact America, told the Sun Sentinal: “What we hope for now is that the father will have compassion for his young son, and not compound the trauma of the past few months with the trauma of a medically unnecessary surgery.”